Overcoming Overthinking and Self-Sabotage: My Journey to Embracing Art

Oct 12th, 2023

Banana Factory Studio #346

I've always been an over-thinker. From the seemingly trivial choices like what to wear to the more profound decisions about life and career, my mind would spiral into a maze of endless possibilities. Each thought was like a domino, triggering another, then another, until their sheer weight paralyzed me. This wasn't just a habit; it was self-sabotage. But in the middle of all this chaos, I found comfort in an unexpected place: art.

Drowning in Doubt

At some point, every artist faces a daunting blank canvas, in my case, glass. That glass wasn't just a piece of sheet but a mirror reflecting my insecurities. Every art brought with it a shower of questions. "Is this good enough? What will people think? Should I even be doing this?" The fear of judgment overshadowed the joy of creation.

My Turning Point

It took me a particularly overwhelming amount of overthinking to realize that I was my worst enemy. I was trapped in a cycle of self-doubt, constantly seeking validation and fearing criticism. But why? Why was I giving so much power to these thoughts? That's when it hit me: I needed to change!

Art: My driving force

N'to Hadja

Stained Glass

Art became more than just a hobby; it was my therapy. It was a space where I could express myself without fearing being judged. Every mistake and imperfection became a part of the story I was telling. I learned to embrace the chaos to find beauty in the unexpected.

I began experimenting with different ways to utilize glass, from creating my own style, glass on glass which I call “Habaism” to glass on Canvas. Each piece reflects my journey, a testament to my growth. Creating became a meditation to quiet the noise and focus on the present.

Changing

Overcoming overthinking wasn't easy, but I found ways that helped me navigate this journey:

1. Mindfulness Meditation: This became my daily ritual. It helped me keep myself in the present, silencing the constant chatter of my mind.

2. Journaling: Pouring my thoughts onto paper gave me clarity and perspective.

3. Positive Affirmations: I replaced the negative self-talk with empowering affirmations. Every morning, I'd remind myself of my worth, talent, and journey.

4. Feedback: Sharing my art on the first Fridays at my studio became a way to connect with others. The feedback, both positive and constructive, helped me grow as an artist and as an individual.

Embracing the Journey

Today, I look back at my journey with gratitude. The overthinking, the self-doubt, and the fear were all stepping stones to who I am today. My art reflects this transformation. It's bolder, more expressive, and represents my African background.

I've learned that perfection is a myth. It's the imperfections, the quirks, that make us unique. Art taught me to embrace these imperfections and see them as strengths rather than weaknesses.

 To all the over-thinkers out there: Your thoughts do not define you. Find your passion, be it art or something else, and let it guide you. Embrace the journey, with all its ups and downs, and always trust the process.

Art saved me. It gave me a purpose, a voice, and, most importantly, myself. So, pick up that brush, that pen, that instrument, and create. The world needs your art, and you need the healing it brings.

*If my story resonates with you, please share it. Let's spread the message of self-love, acceptance, and the transformative power of art.*